Monday, August 23, 2010

Free Will?

There is a line in one of John Pine's song, I heard it on a Jimmy Buffet, Encore,download, about this being a "big old goofy world." And that line came back to me as I read the headline in the newspaper, "College message to parents, Leave, Already." The article talked about the "hover parents," the Velcro parents, the super attentive parent, the ones who have to talk with the children three or four times a day. The colleges have begun to create special ways to separate the freshmen from their parents. It is a big old goofy world.

The old preacher I worked with right out of seminary told me that his parents gave him a suitcase and told him to pack what he wanted. Then he got on a train in his home town and headed off to college. That was all the attention he got. I remember in the 60's when we took my older sister to college. We drove down in the station wagon. We carried her stuff inside, and then we got back in the car and drove home.

When I took my sons to college, there was a three day orientation for students and parents, and I remember thinking why in the world do I need orientation, but they had these sessions about separation anxiety and homesickness on the part of the parents. At one college they began by playing the Beatles song about Leaving Home. I kept thinking I was missing something. I was happy they were in college. It had been something we were planning. It was the next step towards their independence. I don't think I ever called either one of my sons unless there was a specific need.

Apparently the parental desire to help children and to be involved in their lives is so strong that colleges are having to figure out ways to pry the parents out of the lives of the incoming freshmen.

It makes you have to stop and think about the amazing patience and power of God to step back and to allow us as human beings the freedom to live boldly or to mess up. A lot of the evil in the world is a result of our messing up, and yet God's patience continues to work to keep creation within boundaries and to allow us to make our choices. It is something apparently that parental love in many places is having a hard time doing. Colleges are saying that they think that parents need to step back and let their children develop their own identity, make their own decisions, to become independent people. The stepping back part God has done pretty well. Most of the time with God we would like to see God more involved. It is a big old goofy world.

No comments: